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Samar, a Syrian girl from Aleppo, had no idea her marriage to a rich Saudi man in Istanbul would only last one day. This 22-year-old had been longing for a more stable life, away from the atrocities of war. Her hope vanished when she realized she was a victim of a short-term marriage, arranged by her matchmaker, or khattaba, whom she met by chance, when she shared rooms with her and other single Syrian girls in Istanbul. The matchmaker sent Samar’s picture to the Saudi man who was 35 years her senior. He accepted. The wedding ceremony was held quickly, and just as abruptly, the marriage ended.

With a sad face, Samar tells how “a sheikh and two witnesses came over, and my so-called husband gave me 2000 dollars as dowry, then took me to an apartment he rented. The very next day, I woke up to a note saying the rent was paid for, and that he left and was not coming back. The landlady told me not to worry, ‘I’ll find you another husband if you want.”

“Girls’ Residence”

The famous al-Fatih neighbourhood, in the heart of Istanbul, is a business and trade center for Syrians. This is where the girls’ stories usually begin. Around here, they can find special rentals, known as “Girls’ Residence,” where the landlady often turns out to be a professional matchmaker. Most roommates are refugees, some entered Turkey illegally, others are struggling with some kind of social problem or other. There are divorcées, widows, as well as minors who came from Syria unaccompanied.

Their difficult financial situation makes these Syrian refugee girls vulnerable to exploitation by matchmakers and brokers who see in them a mere money-making opportunity, and who resort to swindling and theft to take advantage of them. 

Fatima Abdul-Aziz is the head of “Al-Kawakiby Women’s Organization in Mersin, Turkey,” which is concerned with Syrian refugee women’s affairs. She believes that “what most contributes to this phenomenon are the dissociation of family and social ties, poverty, and the seduction of what is often presented to these girls as a more comfortable and secure life.” 

On July 11, I was able to get a copy of an arrest warrant in the northwestern city of  Sakarya, issued against a Syrian female matchmaker, charged with facilitating prostitution, deception and fraud. A dispute between two men, one Saudi, the other Syrian, led to her arrest. In her deposition, the matchmaker admits to fraud, as she took money to arrange marriages, but denied prostitution charges.  

Numbers

According to a survey by the Directorate General of Migration Management, a subdivision of the Turkish Ministry of Interior, of the 4 million Syrian refugees in the country, around 1.4 million are female. 

United Nations puts at 1.2 million the number of Syrians working without a permit in Turkey. The majority accept much lower wages and more severe conditions than Turkish workers would.

Evrensel website published a study that found “most Syrians are living below the poverty line and working without social security. 50% are unemployment, and 13% have applied for financial aid.” The study was conducted by the Center for Social Policies, and took place in the provinces that host the largest numbers of Syrian refugees. 

While both official and NGO statistics on fraudulent marriages are lacking, and judging from the cases reviewed by the center, Abdul-Aziz asserts that “matchmaker” has become a pseudonym for a type of broker who provides Syrian refugee wives for Arab men in return for a commission, well aware that such marriages would not last long: “Lately, we have been receiving many legal inquiries into fraud, committed in the name of marrying Syrian refugees,” she adds.

Secrecy and Fear

Majd Tabba’, a lawyer who has examined several such cases in Turkey, thinks that the dearth of data is due to the fact that “victims of these widespread marriages tend to keep them a secret, for fear of social stigma and family rejection.”

A One-day Marriage

It was indeed difficult to meet women who fell victim to the matchmakers’ network. Many keep a low profile and refuse to talk about this sensitive topic. Those who did talk requested their names be withheld to protect their privacy. 

Samar, who came to Turkey two years ago, recalls that she was first introduced to Um-Rihab as the lady who offers free accommodation for Syrian female refugees, “just for the love of God,” as the landlady often told the girls who lived under her roof. “In the beginning, things seemed normal and Um-Rihab treated us well,” says Samar, “but then she collected our photos and copies of our documents, and claimed she was seeking funding from ‘charitable people’. Next, she began insinuating that I have a suitor, a rich man who would give me all I wanted. When I first refused, her attitude changed and she began to treat me badly. In the end, I had to accept.” 

How Does a “Marriage by Picture” Work?

The deal takes place on the matchmaker’s social media account, where she provides her name and phone number. The following steps are followed via texts or calls:

First step: the matchmaker asks the male postulant to choose a category, “single, divorced, or widowed.”

Second step: money is discussed.

Third step: The girls’ pictures are sent through Whatsapp, then erased immediately.

Fourth step: if an agreement is reached, a wedding date is set.

Marriage on Vacation

I sat down with Rihab, a 20-year-old who got married to a Saudi national, who then divorced her by phone. She realized the groom only wanted her for the duration of his holiday. She had fallen victim to a so-called “misyar marriage.” According to Islam Web, misyar is a type of marriage contract where the husband and wife are able to renounce some marital rights such as living together, the wife’s rights to housing and maintenance money and the husband’s right to homekeeping and access, the later usually relinquished in order to keep the marriage secret from his first wife and children. Unlike the marriage of mut’ah (pleasure,) misyar  has no time limit. If it does, the contract is actually considered null. 

In Asenuret neighborhood in Istanbul, Rihab says her matchmaker had asked her to keep the union a secret. “I wanted to get married and leave the girls’ residence. He stayed with me for only one week. We kept in touch for another month, after which he asked me to hand over the apartment to the landlord. He had only rented it for one month. Then he divorced me on the phone, said I was now free, and he had fulfilled all his financial obligations.” But Rihab did not receive any dowry, and the jewelry he gifted her turned out to be fake and worthless. She called the matchmaker to inquire: “Um-Hussein said she did not owe me anything, and the only thing she could do is find me another husband, also in secrecy. It was then obvious that the lady was marrying off girls and pocketing their dowry in addition to her fees. After that, she again offers them free residence, on the condition that they undergo hymen reconstruction surgery, so that she offers them up for marriage again as virgins. I refused to do that.” 

When I contacted Um-Rihab,  the matchmaker, she denied the whole story, and insisted on knowing the name of the girl in question, which of course, I could not reveal, to protect Rihab.  

A Journey In Search of a “Bride”

It does not take advanced research skills to get in touch with a matchmaker. Do a google search and you will find a large number of them operating on social media platforms where they post statistics of the promised  brides, including their age, height, weight, hair and eye color.

To know more about the nature of their job, I contacted Um-Qusai, another matchmaker in Istanbul, on WhatsApp, and posed as a postulant who is looking for a Syrian girl to marry. Um-Qusai gave me her offers in detail: “A virgin would cost you between $7,000 and $10,000, in addition to the jewelry, which would be part of “personal clothing.” Divorcées and widows range from $3,000 to $6,000.” What about her fees, I asked? “Brother,” she said, “I charge $1000. If that is okay with you, then I’ll immediately send you some pictures of what I have.” 

She sent me pictures of many girls, insisted the union ceremony be officiated by an imam or sheikh, not in court. Dowry and commission are to be paid ahead of the wedding. 

Ali has a friend in the Gulf who was seeking a wife and ended up falling for the matchmakers’ scheme. Ali was there and has seen it all: “Their network is not centralized. After the groom agrees to their terms and conditions, all those who helped him get married disappear on wedding night. They disconnect cell phones and abandon their apartments without leaving a trace.” 

A man hailing from a Gulf state is considered a catch. I perused many Whatsapp messages sent to Saudi men advertising Syrian girls in Turkey who “want to get married. All you need do is transfer money to the bride you choose to help her get ready. Then come and consummate the marriage in Turkey.” 

For years, Saudi authorities have been aware of this scheme. In 2016, the Saudi embassy in Istanbul issued a warning for its nationals to beware “suspects using fake documents and Syrian IDs in the Turkish cities near the Syrian border, who have been luring in marriage-seeking citizens, through ads on social media platforms. The citizens then come to Turkey only to realize they have been victims of swindling and fraud.” 

Defrauding Arabs and Turks

Sherif (30), an Egyptian citizen living in Istanbul, also has a similar story. The girl he was offered to marry turned out to be already married, so he lost both the mahr and other expenses, totalling $10,000. The “wife” escaped the next morning, after stealing his belongings. She took the marriage contract with her, as well. Sherif had no means to prove he was robbed. There was no evidence of fraud, because he neither knew the witnesses nor the sheikh who wrote the contract. The only thing remaining is the Whatsapp messages, but the number no longer exists, and it was never officially registered.  

These criminal rings  do not spare Turkish citizens either. Last month, Turkish media platforms were buzzing with the news of the arrest of a “Syrian gang ” in Kayseri Province, after security forces received a complaint that they “defrauded a 51-year-old Turkish man of 40,000 liras to marry a 20-year-old Syrian girl, who took the money and disappeared.” The ring consisted of the girl, her 41-year-old father, and her 29-year-old aunt. Interrogated in Hatay Province in the south, they confessed they had “committed the same scheme in 5 other Turkish cities, and earned more than 2 million liras”.

• Article 301 of the Turkish Penal Code states the following:

1- Fraud is punishable by up to three years in prison. 

2- Foreign claimants must deposit 10% of the amount mentioned in the case. 

Source: The attorney, Majd Al-Tabba’

Girls in the Network

Deceit runs in both directions. There are internet matchmaking gangs who specifically prey on young Syrian men. The brides-to-be are gang members themselves. 

Searching for his dream girl, Muhammad (28) from Deir ez-Zur, ended up losing $8,000 to a gang. That money was all he had. “Suddenly everything was gone,” he says. 

It all started last year when Mohammad asked a matchmaker to find him a bride in return for a commission. When the bride was ready, Mohammad went to meet her. She was with her brother, matchmaker himself, and a local sheikh who came to wed the pair. After the wedding, the bride asked him to take her to an outdoor restaurant. 15 minutes into dinner, she went to the restrooms and that was the last time he saw her. She disappeared and her cell phone number was immediately disconnected.  

Forged Documents & Other Creative Methods

The matchmakers’ stratagems vary from one case to another. Some, for example, especially defraud old Arab men living in Istanbul, as Majd al-Tabba’ points out: “These are not simple fraud cases. These are organized mafia rings consisting of men and women with forged documents and fake IDs. And they change their plans according to the targeted victim.” Al-Tabba’ took up a case where a matchmaker, Um-Mohammad, conned $20, 000 out of a 54-year-old Saudi man, via a Facebook ad offering him a chance to have a second wife: “All the documents we checked, passports, IDs and lease contracts, were fake, and cell phone numbers were unregistered, which left the case pending the identification of the perpetrators.” 

Solutions

According to Fatima Abdul-Aziz, in order to curb this phenomenon “refugees should form communities in their asylum countries, to get to know each other and communicate. It is also important to hold awareness-raising seminars to educate women about their marriage and divorce rights, in order to prevent them from being exploited.” 

In the meanwhile, Samar and Rihab are working in a tailor shop. Marriage is now the last item on their priority lists. They doubt they will ever get married again. And al-Tabba’s 54-year-old client is still awaiting the Turkish court’s decision on his case. 

Published on DARAJ.

The Syrian Investigative Reporting for Accountability Journalism (SIRAJ)

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“Stories of women freed from prisons now trapped in a society’s traps”

My phone rings again one hour after concluding the interview on the Syrian-Turkish borders.

During the call, a woman in her 50s wanted me to talk with her older son Ahmed to tell him how important the testimony of his sister “Hend” was on her imprisonment experience from the past was priceless for the Syrian cause, and how getting her story in the media, and her talking about what happened to her, would help thousands of Syrian women who survived the detention centers of the Syrian regime start a new life after their detention ended.

The young man interrupted his mother to tell her, “as if what happened to us wasn’t enough. Now everyone in the world knows about it!”

That was after an interview with Hend Salih, a young woman under 20. She wasn’t very keen at first to talk about what she had been through in detail, in a military intelligence branch’s detention center in Damascus, after her arrest in August 2017 on accusations against someone who had a similar name as hers. She also talked about what happened after she was released.

From Hama Countryside in central Syria, the family denied our request to talk to her about her story alone over Skype. Her older brother requested to be present with us during the interview. After several attempts we were able to contact her, while in the presence of her brother. We talked for more than an hour. The brother was the one shown on screen, while Hend talked in a tranquil halting and stuttering voice in the background. From her tone, it was apparent that she had second thoughts about agreeing to talk, not only because of the memories of torture she endured in detention, but also because of the smearing and psychological abuse she is facing, from some who claim they worry about her reputation, and blame her for getting arrested.

Hend said, “after my release, the first question I was asked was whether I was raped. I felt a huge distance between me and the people around me who shunned me outright. They didn’t talk with me.”

She remained silent for few minutes, before she carried on, “a young man from my town was released months ago. You could hear the noise of joyous bullets fired in the air everywhere. In my case, nobody exchanged more than a few words with me. Even now, I don’t know the reason behind this discrimination. Society blames me for getting arrested. They accused me of having gone through a shame. I remember very well the moment that young man came back from detention. He was released days after me. People gathered and held parties on his honor, as if they were receiving a hero.”

“I hope I lose my memory and maybe it will be easier for me and the horror I still live with every day, despite leaving Syria after my release, I have been saved from the looks of pity, blame and abuse.”

Hend finishes her speaking, while her brother Ahmed runs his fingers through his hair.

After the nightmare, a new nightmare begins

The detention of Syrian women draws a sharp line between their past and future when they are released. That is because detention usually leads to a state of forced isolation, socially and within the circle of the family. They become afraid of talking about what happened to them, or of revealing the violations they experienced, fearing a life-long stigma, in the absence of any substantial psychosocial support for survivors. Those survivors usually see their nightmare ending when they come out of detention, only to start facing new nightmares.

While working on this investigation, for 4 months, most efforts witnessed were providing awareness raising workshops in some neighboring states, and in a limited number of centers in northern parts of Syria, but the tragedy facing survivors is larger than the what has been demonstrated.

In an Amnesty International (AI) report entitled, “It breaks the human: torture, disease and death in Syria’s prisons”, we see some of the psychological and medical problems they faced during detention. Many of the women interviewed by AI said that their family are not in contact with them anymore, after they were released, for reasons that include social norms discriminating against former female detainees and preexisting assumptions that these women experienced rape in prison.  

The torture of a woman

A report by a group of NGOs entitled, “Violations against Women in Syria and the Conflict’s Unjust Influence on them”, in cooperation with the Democracy and Civil Society Center describes their detention and what follows, states: “In relentlessly seeking to destroy the fabric of Syrian society, the detention of women is a technique used by the Syrian government to put families under huge psychological pressures in such a patriarchal society, where honor is connected to women’s bodies. This has led many families to send their daughters abroad.”

In her testimony, Hend said, regarding the situation of women in prisons, “I suffered, and dozens suffered in prison tremendously. They tortured me with no mercy, until I lost consciousness. I saw girls losing consciousness in detention because of physical and psychological torture. I remember a young girl, no more than 15 years old, who lost her mind because of the terrors she witnessed. We suffered psychologically and physically. It was an inferno.”

A Hero who brings shame

In discussions with the investigative team, Nour Burhan, one of the founders of “I Am Her” network that supports Syrian women in practicing their political, economic, and cultural roles in Syria, said “dealing with survivors is different across different communities. It depends on the nature of the community, and on how far her family accepts the situation. In some communities, she is considered a hero who needs support. In other communities, she brings shame, and is faced with isolation and stigma from society. She is shunned from the opportunity of being asked for marriage, or getting a job. In the worst cases, she becomes a pariah, facing situations like divorce, if married, thrown out of the family house, or getting married to an inadequate suitor, as a way to cover up on the shame and avoid scandals. In some cases, survivors don’t even find shelter. We also have on record cases where the survivor was killed.”

Statistics from the Syrian Human Rights Network about the situation of women in Syria reveal terrifying truths, including the situation of women in detention. Fadl Abdulghani, the network’s director, confirmed during a meeting with the investigation team that, “released women face the heavy weight of suffering, falling under a different category of violence against women. It is societal refusal and isolation. If the survivor is living in an area controlled by the Syrian regime, the repercussions are harsher. The period after release could be the hardest in her life, with all the refusal and blame against her from the community.”

A new prison

Meisou, a Syrina woman in her 40s from Deraa, a mother of three children, is a former detainee of Regime prisons, arrested for taking part in a protests in the South of the country. She was imprisoned in March 2012 for two years and three months and transferred between the branch of the Military Security force known as 215 in the district of Kafr Sousseh in Damascus, and Adra prison, until she was released in mid 2014.

She now lives in a country neighboring Syria and suffers severe psychological problems. These manifest themselves in feelings of constant fear and despair  in the state of loss she experiences linked to the exile imposed on her by her family and community.

She says, with a tear running down her face, “after I left prison, I was surprised by my husband separating from me because I had been imprisoned. I left Syria completely. I don’t want to return to that country that trapped me inside its walls and the perceptions of society. Everything I try to create now is focused on the issue of female detainees from Assad’s prisons and supporting survivors to overcome their difficulties that they can face.”

Survivor of the Syrian regime’s prisons face many obstacles in reintegration and getting into the rhythm of daily life after release, especially given the very harsh conditions they withstood during detention. The new situation after release can be summed up in what experts describe as the traditional communal norms. Many survivors, however, were able to carry on with their lives and to face society.

Muhammad Abdulsalam, the psychiatrist who works unofficially at the moment with other torture victims in Idlib, northern Syria, says, “When women emerge from prisons in Syria, their communities deal harshly with them. This can break their lives. And so instead of being treated as women with dignity, a man would say to an ex-prisoner for example: ‘I don’t mind marrying you!’”

ICRC seeks to protect and help victims of armed conflicts through visiting detainees, and through its efforts to reunite families. The situation on the ground in Syria, however, is totally different. There, we see no presence for the ICRC in this regard.

Samah Hadeed, MENA Campaigns Director at AI, said, “the international community, especially Iran, Turkey and Russia, should ask the Syrian government and armed opposition groups to put an end to all types of torture and discrimination against women.”

Bargaining chips

According to the EuroMed Rights’s report entitled “Situation report on violence against women in Syria”, female detainees faced domestic violence on their release. Some of them were divorced, and families killed many. In the report entitled “Detention of Women in Syria: A weapon of war and terror, 2015”, it was said that women face horrible experiences after release. They live through strong trauma after release, including feelings of anxiety and frustration, PSTD, feelings of helplessness, and in some cases this psychological deterioration leads to suicide.     

Ghalia, a Syrian woman who has spent 4 decades as a volunteer supporting survivors to actively participate in the Syrian society, said, “Women were systematically detained by Regime forces during the Syrian uprising as a weapon of war, to put pressures on society and opposition. As bargaining chips.”

The human rights activist Nour Nassar, who is active in Idlib, northern Syria said it is very unfortunate how society deals with female prisoners. As beside the horrors women face in prisons that make them unable to reintegrate into society once released (especially if a woman is used as a bargaining chip by the regime against her armed opposition relatives and is raped in prison repeatedly), on release women need help from their loved ones. This is missing in our society. On the contrary, an ex-prisoner can face isolation, to the extent that some around her would wish her dead.”

Mariam is an ex-detainee who asked to keep her second name anonymous because her husband is still in detention.

Mariam was detained for a year and five months because her husband joined the Free Syrian Army (FSA). She added, “I was arrested while trying to issue a birth certificate for our daughter. They asked me to wait in a room, then many armed young men came and arrested me. I was taken to the political security branch headquarters in al-Maza, Damascus. I had heard a lot about what happened in detention, but realized that the situation is far worse than at. The regime uses all kinds of torture with no mercy. It is true that our suffering in prison was horrible, and it shattered our humanity and future. However, I know that some women faced fresh suffering after release, and I am one of them. Some of my relatives do not wish to speak with me, or to contact me in any way, on account of my detention.”

Social isolation

Huda, 25, was released from Al-Khatib branch in Damascus. She said, “Most women are afraid of what will happen when released, especially the married ones. Society has no mercy, and they become pariahs, bearing the responsibility of violations that they faced. Many women were divorced when they were released. But now, any woman released from her cell will have to live inside a new cell out there.”

Ahmed Barqawi, former Head of Philosophy Department at Damascus University, told us, “Women emerging from the regime’s prisons find out that they are abandoned by their families. This abandonment is rooted in the ethical perceptions of honor. Honor, in this understanding, hinges on women’s virtue. This mode of thinking deprived women of the concept of heroism. Here, we are seeing two values: the value of the great woman who endured torture and rape at the hands of unethical barbarians, and as such should be looked at as a symbol of our national struggle; and the other value is to look at the woman as a sexual object tarnished in the eyes of people.”  

He added, “This woman is a symbol of humanitarian and ethical struggle. Violations against her should raise her standing in her family and among her community members. More than 13,000 women were abducted, including over 7,000 still in detention. Therefore, out of respect for their femininity, and their humanity, and to salvage them from the demeaning look of society on them, we must have professional NGOs that supports women, with domestic capital, and international aid organizations, to care for their lives, especially mothers among them. This all will lead to liberating the patriarchal awareness from the negative look at these women, who must be seen as leaders and good examples: as women who have a higher degree of dignity and honor.”

Helping survivors

Muna left the country. She went to Turkey, where she works today as a coordinator for a rehabilitation programme for survivors of detention, within “Kesh Malek” organization.

She was detained, according to her account, two times by the regime. First, she was arrested in 2012 and then released in 2013. The second time, she was arrested in 2014 and released a few months later, in the same year.

She said, “I belong to a family with many detainees. I was the first to be detained. It came as a shock to the family, but they supported me upon my release. The first concern for my siblings and parents was to reintegrate me in normal life. For society, what happened to me was harsh. The question on everybody’s mind was whether I was raped or not. This is the most prominent concern on the minds of people upon release. The thing that concerns everyone regarding what happened in there is whether a woman was raped or not. Everything else is trivial in their eyes.”

“the female detainees that are released from Regime prisons find themselves renounced by their families. This renunciation comes from a heightened awareness of honour which is tied to a woman’s virtue. This pattern prevents women from being recognized as the heroes they are.

In spite of low capacity, many centers and professionals provide the psychosocial support

Syrian survivors need after they are released. Among them is the social worker Ramah Dimashqi, who worked with a professional team to understand repercussions Syrian women face after release, in their communities and within their families, and how to overcome such obstacles.

Dimashqi is facing many problems in her work but she is determined to continue working, and she believes that awareness raising is a very important way to tackle the tragic situation facing detainees.

She said, “I remember in particular a man we asked what did his daughter do to deserve the treatment he inflicts on her, and his answer was: ‘when a man is inflicted with sins, he must hide.’ At that moment, I was at a loss as to what to say in reply. I was shocked.”

Nour Jizawi is a women rights defender from Syria who lives in Turkey. She works with released female prisoners to help them reintegrate in their lives outside prison. She said, “While many women get support and psychological help, that does not rule out the many violations they faced during detention or after release, including pressures and refusal from society and family.”

A plethora of hardships

According to Syrian NGOs, more than 30 cases of divorce were documented, of women released from Aadra prison, once the husbands learned of the detention. That includes a woman who was detained because of sending medicines to a liberated area. After two months of detention, the prison guards came to tell her that her husband is visiting. Her heart was full of joy then, but after ten minutes, she came back to her cell crying hard. The husband gave her a divorce notification, according to the testimony of another released prisoner.

According to Burhan, “There are no integrated and comprehensive programmes for supporting released female detainees. Programmes run by NGOs are concerned exclusively with parts and pieces of the psychosocial support process, because of the big budgets needed for comprehensive care, which so far haven’t found supporters. Domestic organizations work on raising awareness of the situation of released survivors, and to engage ex-detainees with civic work or livelihood opportunities, beside the occasional psychological support programme. In the absence of an organization to establish a special fund for detainees and their families, they have lacked a listening ear since the beginning of the Syrian revolution.

The women face many challenges in returning and adapting to life after leaving prison, in addition to the harsh conditions they face during imprisonment. Amidst these restrictions they are unable to resume normal life.

*This investigation was conducted under supervision of the Syrian Investigative Reporting Unit – SIRAJ, within the context of “Syria In Depth” project, conducted in cooperation with the Guardian Foundation, with support from IMS.

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